Author

  A Practical Guide

  Author

Jeltje Gordon-Lennox. Foreword by Isabel Russo

  Description

Addressing the origins, history and function of rituals, this book looks at how we can create non-religious rituals to mark important life stages and events. The book offers readers the tools, tempered and tested by the author, to craft their own meaningful rituals for life events such as weddings, births and deaths.

Answering the call for new rituals in our secular age, this book recognises the essential importance of rituals to the psychological, physical and spiritual health of individuals, families, organisations, and society as a whole. The book examines and explains the history, function and place of emerging rituals in different cultures, as well as providing practical guidance for creating your own secular rituals. The author includes examples, risk factors and checklists for the stages of planning new rituals for life events such as birth, marriage, and death, as well as for public occasions such as graduation and protest marches.

  Book Reviews

“This work provides a succinct introduction to the basic concepts of ritual and offers ideas and tips as to how the reader can craft one for themselves. It is relevant to anyone interested in either experiencing or studying ritual-making.”
- Journal of the Anthropological Society of Oxford, UK

  Advanced Praise

“Outside of religious institutions there has not been much published guidance on how to create rituals. Beginning in the mid-20th century though, wedding planners, along with celebrant, humanist, and funeral societies, began to fill the void. Half a century later, DIY rituals can still be awkward, embarrassing, or meaningless. This book takes a decisive step in the right direction. It gives practical advice to readers for crafting rites of passage thoughtfully and creatively.”
- Ronald L. Grimes, author of The Craft of Ritual Studies

“Human beings show an enduring need for ritual. We need ritual, Jeltje Gordon-Lennox suggests, to pause in the frantic whirl of modern life, reflect on our past and approach our future with creativity. In this itself beautifully crafted book, the author lays the theoretical building blocks for understanding what ritual is and why and when we need it, before offering a practical guide to creating and 'crafting' rituals which are deeply personalised but connected to the universal rhythms of life. Taking God out of the equation, may, she acknowledges, leave some people feeling lost, until they discover within themselves the capacity through ritual to connect with their deepest needs and wishes. Built on a lifetime of exploring and creating ritual, Jeltje Gordon-Lennox shares her wisdom and experience in a book which is both deeply reflective and intensely practical. It has something to say for everyone.”
- Margaret Holloway, Emeritus Professor, University of Hull UK and Principal Investigator, ‘Remember Me. The Changing Face of Memorialisation’

“Crafting Secular Ritual draws on Jeltje Gordon-Lennox's wealth of experience and her gentle, compassionate nature. This practical handbook will be enormously helpful to all those interested in carving out unique, meaningful, relevant, and profound secular rituals for life events of all kinds.”
- Lindy Mechefske, journalist and author (Sir John's Table, 2015, and A Taste of Wintergreen, 2011), lindymechefske.com

“This book addresses all aspects of contemporary ritualmaking. The author speaks to her reader's heart and mind. The language is clear and concrete. This book is interesting for scholars, celebrants and everyone looking for ways to meaningfully ritualize life-transitions.”
- Joanna Wojtkowiak, PhD Cultural psychologist and assistant professor, University of Humanistic Studies, The Netherlands

“A fascinating and erudite work on a rich subject that manages to bridge the practical and the theoretical, the broad brush stroke and the minutest detail, in a way that is enjoyable to read and easy to understand. As an independent celebrant, I found it both informative and inspiring, filled with ideas that cover a breadth of rituals that our secular society so clearly needs. Whether you are a professional maker of ritual, wishing to deepen the understanding of how and why human beings ritualise their experiences, or an individual driven by an interest in creating secular ritual to help cross a life threshold, this book will provide the reader with a rich foundation for the creation of meaningful experiences.”
- Tiu de Haan, Celebrant, Facilitator and Speaker, http://tiudehaan.com

“We have forgotten how to make rituals; the lack of ritual in our lives today leads to alienation and loneliness. By neglecting ritual we lose out on an aspect of life that human beings once gave their utmost attention. This book appeals to all, secular and religious. It allows us to reconsider one of the greatest human needs: our ritual life.”
- Gianpiero Vincenzo, Author of New Ritual Society: Consumerism and Culture in Contemporary Society and Sociologist at the Fine Art Academy of Catania, Sicily, Italy

“The time has certainly come for a book like this, which carefully, thoroughly, and skilfully describes why ritual is important, how ritual can be created and realized in secular society with people who are either distanced from their root religious traditions, or who have a secular mind set, or little meaningful relationship with any traditional religion. This book contains helpful graphs, lists, and directions for creating ritual, and describes the role and duties of presiders or celebrants of secular ritual. This is a handbook and reference book which can be used in many ways in a huge variety of circumstances, and I personally want very much to have it in my library. It is rich with scholarship, careful thought, clear explanations, and inspired wisdom.”
- The Reverend Marchiene Rienstra, Interfaith and Unity Minister, Sedona Arizona

“Crafting Secular Ritual is perfectly written to meet the need of contemporary people for meaningful ritual in their lives without necessarily turning to religious traditions that may not resonate with them or their loved ones. Jeltje Gordon-Lennox provides a blending of historical context with modern tools and checklists that provides the scaffolding needed for those who will create rituals for themselves or on behalf of others. As a Unitarian Universalist minister, I often create personalized rituals for a wide range of people who are religious, spiritual and/or completely secular. This new addition to the body of work supporting the need for ritual to mark major life passages and events combined with a detailed methodology for crafting these rituals is most welcome.”
- Margaret Beckman, Minister, Unitarian Universalist Congregation of Castine Castine, Maine

 The three guides in English build on the approach first presented in the books published in French but they are not translations of these earlier guides.

  A Practical Guide

  Author

Jeltje Gordon-Lennox. Foreword by Tiu de Haan

  Description

A succinct and engaging guide to creating a unique wedding ceremony that reflects the couple's love and makes sense to their families and friends. Specific tools include questionnaires, checklists and a specially designed ritual toolbox for writing tailor-made texts and crafting secular wedding rituals.

The trend towards a more secular culture in Western society means that there can be greater flexibility in a wedding ceremony, but couples are often faced with the challenge of preparing a meaningful celebration outside the traditional religious framework. This hands-on, practical guide demonstrates how to approach and prepare a secular wedding ceremony that honours a couple's relationship with honest vows and rituals true to their shared values. In addition, it provides guidance on structuring a ceremony for couples that come from very different cultural or spiritual backgrounds.
Includes the tools necessary for the creation of a ceremony, such as a Ritual Identity Questionnaire, checklists, and many other resources.

  Book Reviews

“Psychotherapist Gordon-Lennox (Crafting Secular Ritual; Emerging Ritual in Secular Societies) aims her book toward those who wish to design a secular wedding ceremony unique to their own bond and personalities. Helpful questionnaires and checklists assist couples in sorting through their individual values and communicating them simply and sincerely. Every aspect of preparing for the ceremony is covered, from composing vows to choosing someone to preside over the service, in addition to destressing techniques for the big day and intense situations leading up to it. VERDICT This no-frills guide to customizing wedding rituals is perfect for those who are willing to put the time and energy into the process.”
- Review in Library Journal

  Advanced Praise

“Ms. Jeltje Gordon-Lennox has written an inventive and highly informative book that everyone can benefit from reading. It's not just for couples getting married, it's for all of us. Her book delves into humanity's relationship, history and sociology that is marriage and weddings. She doesn't solely focus on the predominate western world's view but brings in via the stories she shares with us, all the world's cultures and is inclusive of people and couples from all walks of life. Yes, this book is a guide, it educates and engages us to self-explore who we are at the very core and to discover more about the unique person who is or will be our spouse and our mate. Her book is a delight as much as it is an essential read. Ultimately, it is useful for anyone who desires to have a noble and meaningful relationship with the one or the one's they love - and how to make the concept of a personalized wedding a reality.
Jeltje is a scholar, author, rite-of-passage Celebrant and ritual-maker extraordinaire; how lucky we are to have her share her vast wisdom and knowledge with us. My advice about Jeltje's books is: Read them all!”
- Charlotte Eulette, Int’l Dir. for the Celebrant Foundation & Institute www.celebrantinstitute.org

“In our current culture of "Do It Yourself" rituals, Crafting Meaningful Wedding Rituals is a breath of fresh air for couples, and clergy whose goal is to craft and deliver a wedding experience that is individualized to the couple and inclusive of their guests. Often, couples spend too little time in deep conversation and planning about their actual wedding ceremony. Jeltje Gordon-Lennox offers a comprehensive guide to make that planning process meaningful and lasting.”
- Margaret Beckman, Minister, Unitarian Universalist Congregation of Castine Castine, Maine

 The three guides in English build on the approach first presented in the books published in French but they are not translations of these earlier guides.

  A Practical Guide

  Author

Jeltje Gordon-Lennox. Foreword by Margaret Holloway

  Description

Funerals are among the most important life events in Western society, and fashioning a personalized ceremony for yourself or for a loved one is often the most meaningful way to celebrate the life of the deceased. For those wanting non-religious or secular funeral ceremonies, this step-by-step guide begins by identifying what you want from the funeral and showing how you can make it happen.
With sections on society's views of mortality, our need for rituals and crafting the actual ceremony, this guide provides the tools and philosophy to understand, plan and tailor a funeral for individuals. Includes all the tools necessary for the creation of a ceremony, such as a Ritual Profiles, checklists, and many other handy resources.

  Advanced Praise

'Jeltje Gordon-Lennox has captured every conceivable aspect of what makes a meaningful funeral ritual, and condensed it into an easily digestible and enjoyable format to read. It's hard to imagine you would need another resource than this one. It has everything, and it's so well done.'
- Kyle Tevlin, I Want a Fun Funeral

'A modern and comprehensive guide for navigating the complex emotions and multitude of tasks related to the death of a loved one. Jeltje's practical approach includes a "ritual profile" and other thoughtful tools that help mourners bridge the gap between the past and the future by creating meaningful, healing and authentic experiences through the power of ceremony and ritual.'
- Linda Stuart, Life-Cycle Celebrant, Toronto, Ontario, Canada

'I find this book incredibly helpful as I return to parish ministry after a decade away. I can throw away my antiquated funeral resources and just use the creative process offered by Jeltje Gordon-Lennox.'
- Rev. Sara G. Armstrong, Montezuma Valley Presbyterian Church, Colorado, USA

'Inevitably, we all pass away. Whether the funeral we need to prepare is 2 months or 20 years away, or for ourselves or someone who died leaving no instructions, most of us are at a loss to know what to do. Jeltje slips her hand into yours and accompanies you, step by step, through the process of crafting rituals that honour life and relationships. This guide fills a huge void. It is equally useful for the deeply religious, those who claim no religion and those somewhere in-between.'
- Suzanne P. de Boer, Educational Consultant for children with special needs, Modesto, California, USA

'Even young children understand the importance of commemorating a death with others. A friend and I once buried a baby bird that had fallen from its nest. We marked the spot with a lily and precious drops from our ice cream cones. With humility and care, this book brings us back to the authenticity of early funeral rituals.'
- Mia Mohr, artivist with a transatlantic group of artists and lives in Talca, Chile

 The three guides in English build on the approach first presented in the books published in French but they are not translations of these earlier guides.

  A Transdisciplinary Conversation

  Author

Edited by Jeltje Gordon-Lennox
Contributions by: Ellen Dissanayake, Matthieu Smyth, Robert C. Scaer, Andrés Allemand Smaller, Christine Behrend, Isabel Russo, Michael Picucci, Joanna Wojtkowiak, Lindy Mechefske, Irene Stengs, Gianpiero Vincenzo, Jacqueline Millner

  Description

The importance of secular ritual is discussed within the newly emerging transdiscipinary field of ritology. Shifting away from traditional concepts of ritual tied to religion, the authors weigh the benefits of ritualized practice for general health and wellbeing.

The growing absence of meaningful ritual in contemporary Western societies has led to cohesive research on the history of ritualizing behaviour in different cultures. The relatively new field of ritology, which includes neuroscience, anthropology, cultural psychology, psychotherapy and even art and performance, raises questions about the significance and practice of ritual today. This book is the first of its kind to discuss the importance of secular rituals for cultural and personal growth. Using a transdisciplinary approach, a range of contributors provide an authoritative account of the science and history of rituals and their role in creating healthy societies in the modern age.

 Book Review

“Emerging Ritual in Secular Societies is an excellent introduction to recent thought on secular ritual throughout the social and medical sciences.“
- Journal of the Anthropological Society of Oxford, UK

 Advanced Praise

“Ritual has been an overlooked asset to the healing of trauma and to restoring broken connections. The diverse contributors to this volume make this a widespread and accessible work for all those interested in ritual and social trauma.“
- Peter A Levine, Author of Waking the Tiger: Healing Trauma & Trauma and Memory

“As an artist I'm drawn to secular ritual - those events where we 'make meaning' with each other outside of (though perhaps borrowing from) traditions. We dearly need guidance in this moment, as traditions harden into entrenched divisions. This book on contemporary ritual encourages us to rethink what it is that unites us, what deserves to be celebrated, and how to reinvent rituals to bridge our differences“
- Suzanne Lacy, Ph.D. Artist, Professor, Roski School of Art and Design, University of Southern California

“A delightful exploration of meaning-making beyond the frontal cortex. This fascinating book describes secular ritual as "multi-media packages" of "human technology" for making meaning through sound, touch, smell, taste, color, shape, and motion. A sensual map for times of transition.“
- Lisa Schirch, PhD. author of Ritual and Symbol in Peacebuilding and Research Professor at Eastern Mennonite University, Virginia, USA

“This volume offers a much-needed roadmap for exploring a new territory: that of making sense of life through secular ritual, both in public and in private spaces. It offers foundational chapters and a number of useful case studies. It is a major contribution to the field of ritual studies and will be highly helpful to both scholars and practitioners.“
- Peter Nissen, Professor of Spirituality Studies, Radboud University, Nijmegen, The Netherlands

“For far too long, modern scholars of ritual have ignored the perspectives of living ritualists in favor of developing theoretical frameworks that analyzed ritual from a supposed perspective of scientific cognitive distance. Following in the footsteps of contemporary ritologists such as Ronald Grimes, this volume aims to rectify this situation by offering a transdisciplinary exploration of ritual presented by experienced professionals involved in the creation and practice of new forms of ritual activity. This well-written and informative work will be of strong interest to scholars and students of ritual alike.“
- Ori Tavor, Lecturer in Chinese Studies, Department of East Asian Languages and Civilizations, University of Pennsylvania, USA

“Why do citizens of secular societies continue to ritualize? Contributors to this provocative volume answer with a focus on how we are actually doing it, documenting the immense creativity with which people craft and enact new rituals to celebrate unions, mark life transitions, say goodbye, heal, reconcile and remember, but also to experience the world afresh.“
- Jane K. Cowan, PhD. Professor of Anthropology, University of Sussex, UK

“This book is indeed a transdisciplinary conversation on how ritual supports society in its primary role. The writers remind us that throughout the history of civilisation we have used ritual to deal with potentially traumatic events. As a therapist I particularly appreciate how Robert Scaer relates ritual to the neurophysiology of trauma. In trauma therapy our first challenge is helping people feel safe so they can self-regulate. Michael Picucci contributes outstanding resources for the use of ritual in clinical practice as well as in intimate relationships. The case studies and research demonstrate the importance of respecting ritual timing, interpersonal resonance and our own biological rhythms. Integrating all of these aspects in one book was a stroke of genius!“
- Sonia Gomes, PhD. Faculty of the Somatic Experiencing Trauma Institute, USA. Creator of SOMA (Embodiment - Touch & Movement in Somatic Experiencing) in Brazil and USA

“Emerging Ritual in Secular Societies is a timely addition to the scholarship of sociology and culture, and indeed, to sociology of religion as well. Often overlooked by those who equate ritual with religion, the authors of this book provide rich descriptions of how secular rituals bind communities together and create meaning for groups and individuals.“
- Sharon L. Miller, Ph.D. Director of Research, Auburn Theological Seminary, USA

“Emerging Ritual in Secular Societies is a rich collection of essays, case studies, and interviews that help us understand how people make meaning, mark life transitions, and construct spiritual journeys without the benefit of religious institutions. It contributes not only to our knowledge of ritual practices and secularization, but also to our appreciation of the multiple ways people employ their imaginations to connect with the mystery of grace and the power of human community.“
- The Rev. Dr. Deborah Kapp, Edward F. and Phyllis K. Campbell Professor of Urban Ministry, McCormick Theological Seminary

“This fine volume shines a much-needed light on the growing field of secular ritual, and its breadth and depth offer rich insights for scholars and practitioners alike. It's a wonderful contribution to the important conversation about finding meaning and connection in an ever-more complex world.“
- Sarah Kerr, PhD. Death Doula & Ritual Practitioner, Soul Passages, Canada

“Through ritual we can experience stability and safety. As we 'do something' to mark an occasion, we connect with other people and something beyond ourselves. Those with complex trauma suffer greatly from loss of equilibrium and connection with others. Emerging Ritual in Secular Societies opens the way to treating emotional responses to trauma by ritualising transitions and celebrating life. This is effective when, as Jeltje Gordon-Lennox writes, ritual is a body-based, rather than a cognitive experience.“
- Dagmar Härle, Master in Psychotraumatology (University of Zurich); Practitioner of Somatic Experience, TCTSY-Facilitator (Traumacenter Traumasensitive Yoga)

“A well-researched book, with engaging dialogue on emerging ritual through the human sciences, art and life experiences, which leaves the door open for intelligent discussion. This is more than an academic book, it's a well-intended and clear-sighted discussion. I believe this book will benefit any reader and is an absolute must for many years to come.“
- Cécile Wesolowski, www.cecilewesolowski.com

“This creative enlightening book is rich in perspectives. It conveys a deep understanding of the value and meaning of rituals and incorporates many moving and powerful examples. It will appeal to anthropologists and psychotherapists, celebrants and faith leaders and individuals looking to express themselves at significant moments in their lives. It has the potential to spark ideas and give depth to people's experience.“
- Dr Sharon Pettle, Consultant Clinical Psychologist & Systemic Psychotherapist, UK

“Demonstrating the need for a more inclusive ritual grammar, Emerging Ritual in Secular Societies meets the demands of a changing world. The variety of discussions in this book contribute generously to the bricolage that is the secular ritualist's toolbox. It is a highly useful methodology for practitioners.“
- Nina Faartoft, Head of Ceremonies, Danish Humanist Society, anthropologist and funeral celebrant

  Author

Edited by Jeltje Gordon-Lennox
Contributions : Liv Nilsson Stutz, Aaron Jonas Stutz, Stephen W. Porges, Ori Tavor, Matthieu Smyth, Robin Karr-Morse, Juan Carlos Garaizabal, Alex Namu Kamwaria, Sophia Milosevic Bijleveld, Jeltje Gordon-Lennox, Sasha A. Q. Scott, Bruce K. Alexander, Lisa Schirch, Mae-Wan Ho, Alexey V. Nesterenko, Odile Gordon-Lennox, Peter Saunders

  Description

Coping Rituals

Focuses on why people ‘do’ ritual in times of loss, separation and terror

Reveals hidden connections between fear, trauma, creativity and ritual making

Presents a new model of ritualising developed by Stephen W. Porges, originator of polyvagal theory

This collection of articles reveals ritual to be a unique and powerful asset in healing trauma and broken relationships. Each contribution offers insights on how, in the face of uncertainty, threat and dislocation, human beings feel compelled to 'do something’, usually with or for others, to alleviate their anxiety, fears and sense of powerlessness. The editor and authors demonstrate how the imaginative processes at the heart of ritualmaking contribute to self- and group regulation by healing and mitigating the negative impact of trauma on individuals, collective groups, and even global systems.

The authors are a group of remarkable scholars, researchers and practitioners who represent a diverse range of disciplines and subfields, including archaeology, Chinese studies, digital culture, ecological science, philosophy, psychology, psychotherapy, the politics of memory and the preservation of cultural heritage in wartime, ritual anthropology, social research, physics, research on traumatic stress, and peace studies. Students and researchers across the social and behavioural sciences will find this volume useful.

 Advanced Praise

'A great piece about ritualising at the ambiguous edge!!!'

- Saskia Sassen, Robert S. Lynd Professor of Sociology, Department of Sociology and Committee on Global Thought, Columbia University, New York City, USA. Author of Expulsions: Brutality and Complexity in the Global Economy.

'A fascinating new take on ritual. Gordon-Lennox's work finds new purpose for ritual in focusing on its healing and restorative powers.'

- Timothy de Waal Malefyt, Clinical Professor of Marketing, Fordham University, Gabelli School of Business, New York, NY. Co-editor of Magical Capitalism. Enchantment, Spells, and Occult Practices in Contemporary Economies.

'Provides a radically new perspective on what is at stake when vulnerable individuals and groups are confronted with loss and the trauma it entails. The volume is readily accessible to a broad audience looking to acquire new tools both for an in-depth understanding of the issues involved and for concrete ways to address them.'

Marika Moisseeff, Head of Research, Laboratoire d'anthropologie sociale, CNRS-PSL University, Paris, France

  Cérémonies sur mesure

  Author

Jeltje Gordon-Lennox. Foreword by Christophe Fauré

  Description

In the West, more and more funeral ceremonies are being held without the intervention of religious institutions, and forecasts show that the phenomenon is on the increase. However, the DIY rituals often undertaken in a rush at the time of a death sometimes leave a sense of unfinished business, if not outright malaise arising from the improvised ceremony.

The aim of this handbook is to help the relatives and friends of a deceased person to organise a tailor-made funeral by presenting a series of simple measures that can be put in place. But where to start? Where can one find meaningful texts, music and symbolic objects? Drawing on her long experience as a non-religious celebrant, the author first discusses the various steps involved in customising a ceremony. Then she deals with delicate situations, such as ceremonies for children, suicides, violent deaths or in the absence of the body.

  Cérémonies sur mesure

  Author

Jeltje Gordon-Lennox

  Description

An ever growing number of couples are looking for wedding ceremonies that faithfully reflect their values,  their relationship and their hopes for their shared future. This practical guide by Jeltje Gordon-Lennox is intended for non-religious couples who wish to create a tailor-made wedding ceremony. Its approach to creating tailor-made wedding ceremonies is easily accessible. All the decisive aspects of a personalised ceremony are addressed including organisation, order of the ceremony, choice of the date and venue of the event, the role of loved ones, music, photos and decorations.